My life, soundtrack and all :)

this is the closest you will come to understanding how my mind works :)

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Guess what I'm seeing tonight???

ROCKY HORROR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!








TIME WARPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
Watch this, and then watch this:








:D
Love. This. Movie!

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Do you know what it feels like, being alone? I'll find someone new...

Let me say this before I start: I'm kind of in a bad mental state right now. Nothing to worry about; I have anxiety and this happens all the time. Usually when this happens I do what I have to do (school, honoring previous commitments, small talk with the family for a half hour or so) with as much cheerfulness as I can fake and then go lie under the covers, earphones in, and nap on and off till the mood passes. But my mom is laying on my bed right now, my favorite pandora station is playing a little too much matchbox twenty for my taste, and I left my diary in my locker at school (NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!) and I really need to freaking verbalize some emotions. I will try to do so with the least amount of negativity possible though.

Here's what has happened to me over the last two days:
*yesterday morning!!!!!!!!!!*
Waken up from some truly lovely dreams at the ungodly hour of 9 am by some loud and unpleasant banging on the door and my little sister saying rather loudly "EZRA CAN YOU GET THAT??????? I'M PLAYING GAMES ON THE COMPUTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" *groan.* I drag myself out of bed (messy hair, no glasses) and answer the door to see a random mexican guy standing there. Our conversation went a little like this:
Me: *yawning* ummmmmm... hi?
Him: Hi.
Me: uuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.... *yawns some more. says next part through a particularly long yawn* Hi...
Him: I-I-m here to fix wall? *gestures to all the stuff he has with him*
Me: ummm... k. *yawns and runs fingers through gnarly, tangled, slept-in hair*
Him: I come in?
Me: ummmm sure... *opens door so he can enter*

Looking back I probably should have told him to come back later, considering the fact that my mom wasnt home :P but I was still asleep. And he turned out not to be a creeper, just a maintenance dude named Pablo. And he fixed the hole in our wall.
By the time Pablo left (around 11:30), it was time for me to get ready to leave. My grandma was coming to pick me up so I could help her cook for thanksgiving the next day.
Here's my grandmas house in a nutshell: dark, creepy, dusty. My auntie and her 3-year-old daughter live there, and while I love both of them, my auntie is dreadfully overprotective of me.
Example!
I made the mistake of mentioning that I was gonna see rocky horror with a friend on saturday night, and when she asked who was going with us I said "probably one of her brothers friends" and she got all protective and was like "well I dont know if I can trust her brothers friends!!!!!!"
Me: "We've been to concerts and stuff with them. Theyre college kids so theyre kinda dumb (has flashback to the time her brother and one of his friends wanted to pierce their own noses and decided to do a couple of shots to dull the pain-dont worry,theyre both 21 and they would never offer alcohol to minors-which didnt work, and woke up the next morning with the needles still sticking out of their faces!!!!! oh god, good times) but theyre harmless. I'll be fine."
Her: "no i dont like that. I havent met them and i dont know if I trust them. I think I'll just take you".
Me: Auntie, no!!!!"
her: "why not?" me: (desperately trying to think of a way to get out of going with her) "uhhh...ummm.... the show doesnt start till midnight, and i wouldnt want you to have to stay up later than youre used to..."
her: "im fine with that. I think ill just take you"
me: "on second thought, maybe I wont go..."
her: "why not?"
me: (trying to think of a good lie because i dont think "because if i go with you i cant swear or wear anything fun. and if i went to concerts with you I never would have met the lead singer of my favorite band because you would be like 'theyre strangers and i dont want you talking to strangers' or gotten a hug from the screamer for the band who opened up for FTSK and then gotten like six free red bulls and stayed up all night, and basically even tough i love you I think I'd rather swallow this entire carton of eggs, shell and all" will fly with her) ummmm... cuz the friend im going with is someone youve met before and dont like very much
Her: then say you cant go with her.
Me: *sigh...*
So, because of that, there is a very good chance that instead of spending saturday night with one of my best friends, dressed in something adorable and slightly revealing from her closet and having the sort of fun that only occurs when you stay out late in uptown (nothing illegal or dangerous implied, of course) with some college kids who mainly care about getting us home alive and sober before the sun rises, I will be feeling awkward and uncomfortable in way too much clothes with my 41-year-old aunt and constantly watching myself so i dont swear in front of her, then having to deal with her complain about being out too late/the movie theatre being to loud and crowded/the fact that she cant even hear the movie over the lines being yelled at the screen, and being gulted into leaving early.
I think ill tell her the plans off and go with my friend and her bros friends anyways.
its not like shes my mom. my mom doesnt care (thank you, mommy, for not inheriting the freaky over-protective gene like your sister!)
and her daughter is adorable, but nothing sucks quite like being woken up at 2 am by a screaming three-year-old.
I wont even get into the rest of the day I spent at my grandmas house. Basically I watched lots of tv and went to bed at like 10:30 because i was so bored.
woken up at around 1:30 from a text from a friend who was having a much better time than me.

*thanksgiving day!!!*
woken up from some truly lovely dreams at the ungodly hour of 9 am by my grandma hovering about 4 inches from my face, repeatedly whispering my name. When she sees that my eyes are slightly open, she starts frantically yelling "WAKE UP!!!!!!! WAKE UP!!!!!!!!!!!! WE HAVE TO GET THE NUT LOAF IN THE OVEN BY TEN!!!!!!!!!!!! I NEED YOU TO SNAP GREEN BEANS!!!!!!!!!!!! WE HAVE VEGETABLES TO MASH AND POTATOES TO CHOP!!!!!! AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT YOUR HAIR!!!!!!!! GO!!!! GO!!!!!!!!!!! GOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" then ran away like a chicken with its head off. I rolled off the couch, made some breakfast that i barely remember eating, and drank a cup of coffee. We didnt get the nut loaf in the oven by ten, but thats okay because people werent coming over till 1:30.
I spent the whole f*%&ing day in the kitchen. If it werent for the fact that i had found a pandora station that plays some excellent 90s dance music, I would have snapped and sunken into my depressive state much earlier. at least she didnt object to me wearing my pajamas and hello kitty slippers all day (which im still wearing, btw).  and then they came over.
my mom and second cousin were there, which was great. they both have the awesomest personalities, which was very much appreciated after spending over 24 straight hours in a house full of total nuts. But after eating a ton of food (and having my grandma make me feel totally fat for eating three rolls) and playing
3 card games
4 word games
way too many rounds of the "say what youre thankful for" thanksgiving game (mine: I'm thankful that im not a native american that lived here hundreds of years ago." "im thankful that those dickheads the pilgrims arent around anymore." "im very very very thankful that i dont eat turkey")
and 1 round of charades
I was so ready to leave. I ask my mom "how much longer are me staying?" he said "oh just a few more hours."
PSHAW!!! HOURS?!?!?!?!?!! I barely wanted to be there another minute!!!!!!!! i missed my appartment!!!!!!!!! I missed my bed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I missed my beloved stuffed hedgehog, harold!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So i did what any teenager would do: i took out my ipod and started texting.
Of course, no one was responding because they were too busy eating turkey and spending time with their own families. Really really reallllllllllllllllllllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy regretted not answering that 1:30 am text and enjoying a conversation with someone from the outside world while i still could.
So I got this awesome game called Stick Wars, where you have a wall and a bunch of stick people try to attack it and you have to defend it. you have to throw them up in the air and at the wall and at each other and stuff and then they die. and when you reach higher levels, you can take them prisoner and have them fight for you, and you can train wizards and archers and people to repair your wall and you ca throw fireballs at them and meteors and stuff.
And amazingly, no one even noticed for like a half hour that i wasnt paying any attention to them!!!!! Especially strange since i was leaning my head on my moms lap so i would think shed have noticed... i got to level 32 before she did notice, at wich point she stole my ipod and stuck it in her pocket.
I found her googling stuff on it about twenty minutes later.
Finally, finally, FINALLY, I was allowed to leave.
now im sitting here, listening to my backup sulky-music pandora station that i have in case my other one starts to suck, and basically waiting for bedtime. hoping mom eventually goes to her own bed and doesnt just crash on mine, even though it is quite comfy. and even after writing this post, i dont feel much better.
maybe ill write some emo poetry, or draw pictures with my black and red sharpies. I always end up getting rid of anything i create while in one of my moods, cuz the poetry just sounds pathetic and the drawings always kind of freak me ut to look at, even tough upon closer inspection theyre prety much just random doodles, only in more emo colors.
i think ill go play stick wars some more.

Monday, November 22, 2010

It's time to go so put all your clothes on...

Today I rediscovered my obsession with the Maine :)
I quote that song in my story.
Well this week I only have two days of school!!!!! Yessssssss!!!
Here r my plans:
Wednesday- thanksgiving preparation with my grandma
Thursday- thanksgiving with Mi familia
Friday- hang out with Jude?
And finally....
Saturday- ROCKY HORROR AT MIDNIGHT WITH SOME FELLOW FANATICS- the same ones I do the time warp with every day in history class!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm so excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

on Sunday I will probably practice my song for my Rocky Horror audition with one of my friends... If I can, that is.
Around thanksgiving I'm always feeling my most rebellious... Kind of wanting to start a protest. Protest that people should only buy organic, humanely raised turkey? Or that it's bogus to celebrate a holiday that is basically about the pilgrims being treated so nicely by the native Americans, only to return the favor with smallpox and eventually taking their land and forcing them onto reservations? Maybe get some peeps together and walk into a ridiculously priced store dresses as homeless people? I don't know. I'll probably just sneak into an r rated movie and eat a pound of movie theater popcorn with extra butter (which is what I did last year to get my rebellious energy out).
Idk. Hopefully I'll gef a better idea.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

I love this :)




favorite nevershoutnever song and i really love the video for some reason :)

Saturday, November 20, 2010

I made a video!

Yeah this was just me being lame Xd I guess its more of a slideshow than a video...
I will post another one in the near future.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

"You'll be my princess and I'll be a toad..."

Hey :) I think that you should totally listen to a little song called "mario kart love song". It's on my playlist and its pretty much my favorite song right now :) I know it sounds really lame and cheesy, but its actually super cute and i can guarantee that it will make you smile :)
thats all I have to say.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Omg :O

I just found out that my friend with the big hair hates building snowmen!!!!!!!!
What kind of person hates snowmen????????????????
I'm going to have to rethink our friendship...

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...

Personally if someone I thought was my true love gave me a bird for christmas, I'd be a little pissed. Birds are supposed to be free!!!! Not given to people as Christmas presents!!! Id much rather have a barnes and noble gift card.
Anyway, my computer is acting up, so I have to type this blog post on my iPod touch :P. Just a fun fact.
Let's see, what to type about...
Yesterday I watched the first (and last) Halloween special that I've watched this year. Yes, I know Halloween was two weeks ago. But me and my friend with the big fluffy hair wanted to watch "it's the great pumpkin, Charlie brown!". Together, and we were both busy the weekend of Halloween (par-Tay!!!!!) and we weregonna do it last weekend, but his mom was suffering from temporary insanity or something and said no for no apparent reason (seriously, he was like "why couldn't Ezra come over?". And she was like "I don't know. ". :P). So yesterday we finally did that :). It was great. I love hanging out with him.
It has finally snowed :). I really want to go do winter-y things (build snowmen, have a giant snowball fight, go buy hot chocolate with extra chocolate at the coffee shop, decorate Christmas trees, watch Casablanca (which I like to do in winter for some reason), buy ugly holiday sweaters at ragstock, bake christmas cookies, Etc...) before I get sick of the snow which always happens. Me and the same friend that I hung out with yesterday have plans to watch the Charlie brown Christmas special (which always makes me cry at the end) and bake brownies and right now I am attempting to organize a snowball fight with some friends whom I can hopefully go get hot chocolate with afterwards. Sadly, it looks like most people already have plans :(. I'm considering just posting my facebook status as "comment if u live near me and want to have a snowball fight today". I really want to do something!!!
If all else fails, ill go shopping for warm clothes and ugly holiday sweaters. If I can get any money, that is.
Well I'm gonna go. Bye blog readers! (if I have any blog readers... :P)

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

"All those other Slim Shadys are just imitating..."

I know all of the words to that song :) and I can sing along with it without messing up about 95% of the time.
I'm not sure whether to be proud or horrified by that.

So NaNoWriMo... Erg. Why cant it be some time in the summer? like July? July would be a great month to write a novel!!!! It's not like you have anything ese to do. This last July all of my friends were busy with camp and stuff. I was so bored most of the time!!! Why couldn't it have been NaNoWriMo then???????

So tomorrow im going to school dressed like Marylin Monroe... its for history class. That should be interesting...

Ummmm I dont have too much to say today...
bye!

Saturday, November 6, 2010

okay, sooo....

i didnt watch spongebob, eat a snack OR write. instead i did all sorts of stuff that ive been procrastinating doing, and then i wrote on my friends facebook wall in vietnamese, and watched an episode of "21 jump street" (i love that show!). I changed my facebook pic, i think i broke my record for "most non-productive things done in an hour or less". But now my mom is watching "the big sleep" and i think its boring even though it has humphrey bogart in it, so basically im killing time. and wasting your time with this lame blog post :P
i dont even have writers block. I simply dont feel like it.
okay and i actually am going to go write this time! i am!! i am i am i am i am i am i am i am!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Quit playin games with my heart...

Today I accomplished...
-two pages of my NaNoWriMo story
-beating one level of the worlds hardest game (go to addictinggames.com and search for it. its strangely addicting)
-drawing one picture (what i think Snow White would look like if she was alive today)
-drank two cups of coffee (all black with lots of sugar)
-bought three buttons (all for other people)
-gave three dollars to a homeless dude
-successfully eavesdropped on someones converdsation...in spanish
-translated part of a Gwen Stefani song into spanish WITHOUT the use of the internet
-Realized I am a total geek when it comes to spanish
-convinced the guy at the comic store to give me a discount (oh yeah, i am just that good)
-wrote a poem (topic is a bit controversial so i will not be putting it on here)

Am I happy with all thse accomplishments?
No, I am not.
-only two pages?!?!? must stop slacking off.
-was playing that game when i should have been writing
-a.)she has no legs, and b.)drew it when i should have been writing
-two cups on an almost empty stomach. anyone whos ever drank two cups of coffee on an almost empty stomach knows that this is not a good idea
-my original reason for shopping was to buy myself a skirt...not buttons
-okay, no regrets here :) just wish i could have afforded to give him more...
-eavesdropping on spanish conversation when i should have been writing.
-trranslated song when should have been writing.
-cant believe i did not realize this untill today.
-wasted time at comic store when i should have been writing. plus, he only discounted the tax. so it was only like a few dollars.
-wrote a poem when i should have been writing my NaNoWriMo story!!!
and now im blogging when i should be writing.
and also facebook-ing when i should be writing.
on the brighter side, Im getting my aunt to upload the pics of me on halloween when my costume was a piece of glitter :) maybe ill put it on here when she puts it on.
uhmmmmm..... i really dont have muchelse to say. :(
my mom is convinced im doing bad things and just spent like a half hour looking over my shoulder. of course she found nothing.
ok, i should probs go write. or consider writing. or maybe get a snack. oooh, i like that idea.
i feel like spongebob in the episode where he has to write an essay and he doesnt want to so he procrastinates until five minutes before class starts...
and now i want to wtach spongebob. im gonna go do that. and eat a snack. and then write.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Thursday, November 4, 2010

I'll get you a satanic mechanic...

So. Today I had to stay home from school. Long, dramatic story. I'm spending it watching 21 jumpstreet and disney movies that I haven't seen in forever (I'm watching Anastasia right now!).
But I'm also writing. I started my story over. My main character-Maria Svetlana Carrion-is still in it, and the same thing eventually happens, but I changed the entire beginning. I decided she has hair like Magenta's :) And I took some of my favorite characters from other stories that I started and never finished and im putting them in it :) i hope it turns out better than the other one was. And amazingly, I knew exactly how to start it the second I came up with the idea for how i was gonna change the beginning!!! Ive already started it :) which is a miracle because i suck massively at starting stories.
Now im gonna go write and watch Anastasia some more :)

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

It's astounding, time is fleeting...


I FINALLY saw that movie!!!
and guess what?
I LOVED IT!!!!!!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHH IT WAS AMAZING!!!!!!
I SOOO wish I had hair like Magenta's. Or that I could pull off hair like Magenta's. Here's a pic of magenta that I found on google images and edited on picnik.

Anyway, guess who's been massively slacking off on her NaNoWriMo writing... *raises hand*
I got a couple of pages done today while TAing... but i got distracted and started writing in my diary instead.
I know im not supposed to, but im thinking of starting over...
Yeah. thats all i got today. byes.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me, creature of the night ;)

INNAPROPRIATE SONG ALERT!!!!!!
And yet... that whole soundtrack is so damn catchy...
Andyways, day two of NaNaWriMo!!!!!
I actually got some done today :) but the ammount I did get done is downright pitiful :/
I did most of my writing in history class. We just got done with WWII and other stuff that happened in the '40s, which I know pretty much EVERYTHING about from my (very) brief phase where I was obsessed with the '40s. Now we're getting into the '50s and the cold war, which I also know about. So I take notes of things I didn't already know, but mostly I write or draw. So I hope to get most of it done in that class :)
Also, I'm TAing for the spanish 1 class, and our spanish teacher warned me that id probably have lots of down time, so i might get something done during that time too :)
the main problem is the lack of excellent writing music... it always helps to have music. for me at least. and snacks. and coffee.
Well snacks are covered-i just bought a ton of wasabi peas, and my acting teacher always has coffee in his room. I could live on wasabi peas and coffee :)
well i should probs quit slacking off and go write more. byes.

Monday, November 1, 2010

first day of nanowrimo=massive fail.

Okay, so its the first day of nanowrimo. I WAS going to write... but its a day off from school and i was still friend from the extended halloween that I had, so i slacked off. i spent all day napping and watching cartoons. im disappointed in myself :P
But i swear that tomorrow i will start on my novel.
thats all. im going back to sleep now. bye.