if you do this at brueggers, I hate you.

this is just a rant. I work at brueggers and have to deal with an abundance of dumbasses every time I work there. Most of the time, however, its harmless. Mildly stupid questions, extremely messy eaters, people who wear outrageous outfits, etc.

But these are the things that drive me crazy.

-Not taking care of your garbage. Anyone who's ever been to Brueggers knows that you are supposed to take care of your OWN trash. There are no waiters or bus boys or anything. its cafeteria-style-you go to the counter, order, move to the cash register, pay, take you food to a table, eat, throw your stuff away, put the tray next to the garbage, and leave. But every once in a while, someone laves a huge pile of garbage on a table for me to clean up, or leave their glass bottles next to the garbage can instead of actually throwing them in the garbage can, or THROW THEIR NAPKINS ON THE FLOOR. It is SO GROSS having to pick someone else's used napkins off of the floor. And the bottles thing? Why? Just why? I KNOW the garbage isn't too full-I make sure it's never too full-and the can is 3 centimeters away from where you put the bottle. I don't get it!

-"what does the blueberry/pumpkin/hazelnut coffee taste like?" This is just such a stupid question. It tastes like coffee mixed with blueberry/pumpkin/hazelnut. What else would it taste like?

-"yeah, can i have a decaf mocha bruegaccino with whipped cream and a swirl of caramel?" No you may not. We don't serve that. We do have a mocha bruegaccino, but we do not make them decaf, nor do we have caramel or whipped cream. There is a dunn bros. RIGHT NEXT DOOR. There's actually a door connecting us with them. While we do serve coffee, and would love to serve you something reasonable, if you want something complicated, please go there and stop wasting my valuable bagel-slicing coffee-pouring time.

-"waitwaitwait-it costs HOW much?!?" Our prices are listed on the menu board. And they're perfectly reasonable. If you have issues with it, then a) order something less expensive-maybe instead of getting a large mocha bruegaccio which costs around $4.50, you could just get a coke? Instead of an herby turkey on a square bagel with extra cheese and three extra veggies, you could get a simple bagel with cream cheese? Don't get me wrong, I LIKE it when you spend your money here, but if you're not happy with the price, these are ways to lower it. And b) for the love of jesus (pronounced hey-seuss) don't take it out on me. I'm just the cashier. Talk to the guy with "general manager" written on his name tag, and maybe he'll take it up with the people at the head of the bruegger's royal family (but he probably won't). I do try hard to make sure you don't waste your money-like if someone asks how the hot chocolate is, and I know it's terrible, I will tell them its terrible and recommend something else. But it's not like I'm gonna give you my employee discount because you complained about the price.

-Letting your spawn run loose. Put the kids on a leash or something. Or tell them to stay next to you. Please don't let them run around, knocking over garbage cans, moving tables around, yelling, trying to go behind the counter, etc. It bugs me to no end.

-I can't read your minds! If you ask me for a soda, and I ask what size and what kind you want, don't get annoyed with me. I can't read your mind-I don't know what you're thinking when you say "soda". Try "I'll have a small coke" or "I'll have a large sprite" instead of "I'll have a soda". Same goes for coffee.

-Just being rude in general. If you give me a long order ("3 large coffees, one hazelnut and two pumpkin; two diet cokes, one medium with ice, one large without; two bruegaccinos, one mocha; and a small hot chocolate" or something like that) then don't get impatient. I'm going as fast as I can, I promise you. This is the kind of order you call ahead for so we can have it ready when you get here. Don't use a demanding tone-that bugs the hell out of me. And once an old man asked me "why are you so chipper?" Well, it's my job to smile and be friendly. I've actually practiced my smile in the mirror for this job. And no matter how crabby I am, I use the friendliest tone I can. You have no reason to be rude to me.

Now a thank-you to some of our great customers. The big tippers, the ones who smile back at me, who compliment my earrings and who don't look at me like I'm psycho when I tell them to have a nice day, the ones who call ahead for their obscenely large orders, the ones who look at my nametag and call me by my name... you guys are great. I want to high-five you all. You guys make up for all the a-holes.

Well, this has been an Ezra rant. Until next time.